bachelor party – PartiStaff Australia

Well, well, well… another buddy bites the engagement dust and here you are scoping out cool Bucks Party ideas to throw the pinnacle of all Bachelor parties.

Strap yourself in mate. It’s time to simultaneously shift both your hedonism and decorum from first gear into fifth. You have a delicate balancing act of spoiling the Groom, roasting the Groom and pleasing all da boiz, whilst clawing it out the other end semi-unscathed.

This is a tradition you do not want to kook on. Seriously… bucks parties are a tradition rooted in ancient history. Dating back as far as 5th Century BC, Spartans were the OG lads to first honour a groom’s last night as an unmarried man. Although, we sense “good form” for bachelor parties back then were a little less wild and a little more (or a lot more) polite.

But as much as us 21st Century folk idolise a notorious party to rival The Hangover, in reality you only want to lose a few inhibitions, not the Groom.

Remember, this isn’t about being a bad (and misogynistic) 80s sex movie.

Yet we can’t all have Jon Olsson’s legendary father-in-law and mates as a logistical brain trust, the luck of being in the right place and right time with Bill Murray’s spontaneity, the #sponcon deals of Nick Jonas, nor the allowance of Prince Harry.

So listen up all you wannabe Tiger Woods, this is how you can come close to par.

Gliding through an unforgettable “last night of freedom” – minus the next day headaches, anxiety, regrets and/or felonies – has never been smoother.

Here are the top 10 best bucks party ideas for an unforgettable Bachelor party.

1. Whisky is a win

Sometimes the Groom-to-be would rather be sipping on a dram of rare whisky, than smashing down tequila shots. Lean into the refined route and round up each lad to bring along their finest bottle of choice. Stack up the options, and have a personal bartender serve up the tasteful mouthfuls and the tasteful chat.

2. Surprise boat party

They’ve been immortalized in film, music, books and popular culture.. just think of Lonely Island’s “I’m on a Boat”. Boats are clearly a classic party space and a clear winner for a cool bucks party idea. Nothing rocks the boat like your favourite mates soaking up the sun, whilst sipping on your favourite frothies, skimming across the water past land dwellers. Ya get wet, ya go wild, it’s simple math.

But these things are more fun when the Groom (or even some of the guests) don’t know the full schedule of play. So spice it up and ensure the Bucks crew don’t know at all until they rock up to the marina. Ideally you go large too… because when you combine surprise with boats you want a superyacht not a dingy.

Nicholas Frankl, three-time winter Olympian and owner of luxury events company My Yacht Group, has been hosting the most exclusive Grand Prix parties aboard superyachts for the last twelve years. His simple advice? “Make sure your Perrier-Jouët champagne is first class – cold and chilled – and that the caviar is ready upon arrival.”

3. Place your bets

Competition, friendly or not, is a no brainer. Take the rivalry to a VIP Poker room, a private basketball court, a world-renowned golf course, a shooting range, or an entire games arcade. Place your bets and let the games begin. Our only suggestion? Make sure you hire a cool scorekeeper to keep it fair.

4. Playtime

There’s truth in toys get the boys because we all love a kick of adrenaline.

Think a high speed race track with luxe cars, wave jumping on jet skis on the Gold Coast, motorcross bike riding in the outback, cruising a yacht in Sydney Harbour, surfing uncrowded waves down the coast or battling it out in a Melbourne virtual reality centre.

Keep tabs on who is winning what… then allocate the shots accordingly.

5. Fancy dress

This isn’t one just for the ladies… and interpret how you will: either dress up in costume or dress like your Bond.. yes James bloody Bond.

Prepare a dare, a costume or something to compliment the Groom’s birthday suit. Weave in a little (or a lot) of bearable humiliation for the Groom. Key word being bearable. … but then be sure to have an appropriate outfit change for the continuation of celebrations. You don’t want the night cut short because of an inadvertent nut slip.

Otherwise, stick to the tux and go luxe.

6. Fuel fun

The mode of transport is more key than DJ Khaled and relies on a correlation with the size of the Groom’s (no, not that)… entourage and, probably, ego.

Charter a private jet or a helicopter, try hiring the entire fleet of Porsche 911s on offer at Cliff To Coast or hire a hummer or a convoy of classic Pontiacs / Aston Martins / Mustangs and Chevrolets. Riding around together keeps the group morale flying high (sometimes literally if you’re in the private jet option).

7. Get outta town

… or go into town.

Secure a Bachelor pad for the night.. or weekend.. or week.

Does the Groom prefer penthouses, lake houses, beach houses, beach shacks, chateaus, chalets or a camping ground? Obviously international travel is looking limited for the moment, but can you travel interstate or downtown? Whatever you do, move the laddish antics away from your home, the Groom’s home, and any of the guests’ homes. Bucks night debauchery (even if that’s just a helluva lot of glass to clean up from whisky tasting) is not for your casa.

8. Bring luxury to the table

You want excellence in quality and service. It can manifest in the choice of poison, the transport, the venue, or the steak (eating is not cheating if you’re running a marathon). Come to think of it, food is really where it’s at. Find a Chef’s Table or book private catering in along with some black tie waitresses to dose up the opulence.

9. Ladies

Whether the Groom is a “gentleman” or an absolute “lad”, sometimes you just need to balance out the testosterone. We’re not even saying get a stripper… because if tv and movies have taught us anything… that often fails.

So how about a topless waitress, an elegant host, a group of atmosphere models or a bartender? You’ll get class and charisma. Just no touching please.

10. Sinful selfcare

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Selfcare seems to be the buzz word of 2020. And ya know what? We’re here for it. Sometimes the lads need some serious rnr. Go tee up some (above board) massages, pedicures, yoga, classical or acoustic musician to bring on the chill vibes before the hectic big day. Of course if we’re all about balance then you’ll need to balance all that out with a few delicate sins… like Cuban cigars or fine wine. Surely we have some yoga teacher talent in our mix… or even just a model who gives a great head massage whilst making a solid negroni. Have a look 😉

Now you wouldn’t think we’d just load you up on a bunch of unique bucks party ideas without a word of warning did you? So here comes our 2 cents of unsolicited advice… document the night if you wish, but some things are best left in memory… or as from Sid from The Hangover wisely advised: “Remember what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Except for herpes. That sh*t’ll come back with you.”

We truly wish you good luck. Send it!

We’re a nation of winners, even if by default.

So when Melbourne, marginally lost the title as the world’s Most Liveable City last year – a feat it had reigned in for seven years – we took it upon ourselves to do what we do best: stew on it for a few months.

Now we’ve cut our losses and crowned it with a new, improved title: the Most Bucks Party (-able) City.

Between its slew of sporting entertainment (from weekly Darbys to AFL Grand Final and Cricket Boxing Day Series) and density of pubs, local breweries and dens, mixed with its diverse club nightlife, world-class and hipster dining, as well as dynamic “culture,” Melbourne is the royalty of destinations for celebrating Grooms-to-be.

In a place where there are probably more choices for beer as there are trams, choosing the perfect Bucks Party venue is surprisingly overwhelming.

Lucky for all of you knighted as Best Man, we’ve done the heavy lifting and handpicked (handpicked = keyboard bashing) the finest of Melbourne’s bucks spots that’ll give you a proverbial (key word: proverbial) boner… and make your lads livid they hadn’t thought of these first.

If you’re not Best Man, send this over to whoever is on Bucks organising duty and tell them to get their plastics ready. While you come to the realisation the plastics we’re referring to are credit cards, here are the best Bucks Party venues in Melbourne.

Melbourne Cable Park

Kick off your Bucks day by skipping the coffees, because with Melbourne Cable Park you’ll be jittering with enough adrenalin to fuel your alertness.

The boys can take turns wakeboarding laps around a lake, with opportunities to exert their testosterone superiority by tackling the obstacles around the course.

Take advantage of the no admission fee for “spectators accompanying paying guests,” and hire a cheerleading squad to boost the Groom’s ego. It’s all wholesome fun to counteract whatever will happen come nightfall.

Albert Park Golf Course

Centrally located (for all you property moguls) and stumbling distance to St Kilda Road, the 18 hole course has lake and CBD views so when you kook a shot, you can say you were distracted by the picturesque scenery.

Save the serious competition for your Corporate Golf Days and instead tee up the “Goofy Golf” – a short format 6-hole course combining long drive competition and putting competition with custom soft balls and oversized golf clubs, followed by a BBQ and drinks. It’s the quickie version of golf for the laidback lad or the Bachelor Party on a mission.

Don’t forget to enlist one or two personal caddies (*cough cough* – we have a bunch of talent) to take you to your happy place and give you plenty of “moral support”.

Let the sledging begin.

Bucks Party Boat Cruises Docklands

Booze and cruise go together better than a Groom and a Bride on a wedding day, so for 3-4 hours booze and cruise down the Yarra River with all the guys and, ahem, any additional guests.

Whilst technically not one specific venue, who cares because everyone loves being on a boat! If you don’t, get out and swim your way home. Bet you’d prefer to be on a boat now.

Now that we’re all on deck, the Boat Cruises available in Docklands combine all you need – views, novelty, not having to commit… to a singular destination… all in the one (floating and isolated) place. There are a bunch of providers to make the Grooms wet dreams come true, just take your pick.

Carlton Brewhouse

Carlton and United Brewhouse — Soucre: CUB

Drop the term “brewery” and your boys will squeal louder than pigs in a sty at feeding time. The OG hard-earned thirsts were brewed behind the infamous red brick walls at the home of VB and Carlton Draught, and they have over 2 million litres of beer produced here on the daily.

Book a tour to wet your whistle and determine if the brew “needs more dog,” then stay on for a BBQ in the Beer Garden.

Private suite at the MCG

Gentlemen, would it truly be a Bucks Party without the Gentleman’s sport… or just sport? Unlikely.

Cricket or AFL, choose your match and play on with a private suite at the MCG. Prefer opting for the GA section? Then risk being sin binned for life by your mates.

The exclusive suites can host up to 18 of the Groom’s truest blokes, serving up footy fare and grazing grub, premium level 3 viewing behind sliding glass in an “intimate environment” and, of course, private bathrooms. Sort yourself two private drivers and they can drop you right into one of your two VIP car parks.

Let’s also note the MCG so kindly mentions, “As corporate suites are private facilities, the dress code will be at the discretion of your host.” We’ll take that as a clear invitation for costumes or party shirts, so even if your team doesn’t win, you’ve already won with the clothes you’re probably wearing.

Corporate Box at Marvel Stadium

You’ll never be Wolverine or Thor, but you can be a hero by booking a Corporate Box at Marvel Stadium. Up to 16 guests get much the same as the MCG set up, but with a larger smorgasbord of marvelous (sorry, we had to) entertainment options, like UFC (we’re looking right at the Robert Whittaker vs Israel Adesanya fight), the Big Bash, Concerts, and special events.

If it’s good enough for Chris Hemsworth and Matt Damon, it’s good enough for us.

We’re also giving big thumbs to the original developers for plopping a stadium in a spot that’s walking distance to the Docklands booze cruise you came off earlier in the day.

Smokin Barry’s Diner and Bar

What has smokey eyes, goes low, and does it slow?

The BBQ meat at Smoking Barry’s, that’s what. And they have a Texan-inspired venue right in South Melbourne serving up saliva-inducing pulled pork and beef brisket for all the meatheads.

There’s a bar and patio beer garden, but the real party is in Barry’s Boardoom; a private meeting space for 14 people to make not-so-serious business happen (we’re thinking a Wolf of Wall Street Office Party vibe).

Suits or cowboy hats optional. An empty stomach and fun mandatory.

Pins Royale at KingPin Crown

Coined as the “The jewel in the Crown”, the Pins Royal is hitting bougie levels. This is a discrete, exclusive and premium Bachelor venue for the money-eyed Groom who is also a pure legend because he’s genuinely friends with everyone. Holding a capacity of 150 people, bring the big dick energy and fill it with buddies and a few atmosphere models, crowd warmers and party hosts… there’s space for everyone, even the supplied personal butler.

But the crème de la crème, isn’t the freshly shucked oysters with ponzu dressing, it’s the bowling. Hear us out on this: two mahogany bowling lanes with state of the art BES-X bowling technology (we don’t even know what that tech is but we’re in), and, of course, gold bowling balls and designer bowling shoes to pull your best bowling manoeuvres. Take all our monies now.

If that happens to get too boring, you also have karaoke to belt out wildly inappropriate tunes – we’re thinking Whitney Houston’s high pitched “I will always love you” – and a luxury pool table to snooker that atmosphere model the Groomsmen are attempting to impress.

City Of Melbourne Bowls Club

Want to bring your bowling-style-action a little bit more down to earth… literally closer to ground level?

Hit up a few of the rinks in the City of Melbourne Bowls club in Flagstaff Gardens. For the geriatrics Bachelors who are used to smaller balls, you can spend the afternoon or night playing a sport (barefoot) the Groom is unlikely to be concussed in (unless there is a very rogue bowl). Casually refine your bowls technique, whack a few snags on the Barbecue and toast beers, or even sip on G&Ts. And for the particularly energy-conservative Groomsmen, we have plenty of models who can retrieve the bowls for you after each match.

It’s the ideal bachelor venue for the Groom who wants to pace himself.

Balnarring Picnic Races

Forget the elitist shit-show that is Melbourne’s Spring Racing Carnival, we’re after a casual punt in a relaxed atmosphere.

A little south-east of Melbourne, hire a party bus, hummer or convoy of vintage cars to transport the boys out to this sunny racetrack that’s a leader in grassroots picnic races.

The lack of formality also makes it ideal for leaving the ties solely for the upcoming wedding day.

Choose between marquees, roped off sections, picnic tables or throwing down a rug – it’s a winner for all budgets and, hopefully, your bets.

Good Heavens

Visualise craft beers, spicy southern fried chicken, Aussie wines, 80s inspired cocktails, chilli nachos with brisket mole and board games, along with a Miami style rooftop bar married with some of the best views in Melbourne.

Why go to hell when heaven is right here on Bourke Street.

Penthouses at The Cullen

For the discerning Bucks who want to luxuriate, contain the celebrations and avoid a next-day scene a la The Hangover, you have all you need when you book one, or both, of the Penthouses at The Cullen.

Laze about Lady Luck and The Growler apartments at your leisure, whilst you have the rest of Melbourne at your doorstep. We’re not sure you even need to leave when you can browse the personal art library or soak up the sun on the rooftop balcony – this is also our cue to tell you to hire one of our PartiStaff talent to act as a private butler or topless waitress so the Groom can completely moss out and mould his body to the outdoor sun lounges.

They say whatever happens, stays in Vegas, but we have a feeling it can also stay in the walls of these venues too… which means we’re back on our winning streak.

Tag: bachelor party

Top 10 Bucks Party Ideas